


my dad's a sobbing green rage monster?

by whatsanaccounttoagod



Series: catching up [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Bruce Banner Is Actually Peter's Dad, Bruce Banner Needs a Hug, Family Issues, Gen, I Needed Fluffy Stuff And Also Felt Bad About Not Posting, Implied/Referenced Suicide, So here we are, Trans Peter Parker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-19
Updated: 2018-10-19
Packaged: 2019-08-04 09:33:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16344287
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whatsanaccounttoagod/pseuds/whatsanaccounttoagod
Summary: Bruce's past tends to catch up with him.Peter Parker was no exception.





	my dad's a sobbing green rage monster?

**Author's Note:**

> new conspiracy theory: bruce banner is richard parker
> 
> sorry for not posting anything in ages life happened and i threw this together in like an hour oops

Bruce Banner started as a pen name.

Then he got married, had a kid, and ended up in a plane crash orchestrated by a terrorist organization to take him out that didn't take him out.

Thanks, big guy.

Bruce tried to eat a bullet, and the Other Guy probably said the most he ever would.

_Can't let you die. Too important. Puny. But smart. Important._

Banner'd tried to talk to the Other Guy as well over time.

_Hey, big guy._

He rarely responded.

_Could you do me a favor?_

The other guy rumbled. _Smash?_

 _Maybe. If it comes to that._ Banner pulled up Peter Parker's file. _Protect my kid._

_Spider-Baby?_

He blinked. _What?_

_That's Spider-Baby._

"That's not-" he started aloud. Things always felt more real that way. But… They looked about the same size… Same build… Maybe the Other Guy was smarter than people gave him credit for. "FRIDAY, can you bring up images of Spider-Man?"

"I'll do you one better." She brought up the schematics for the spider-suit and laid them over a full-body image of Peter. "Direct comparison of Mr. Parker and Spider-Man."

Damn, they were close. "Is Peter…?"

"I am not authorized to reveal that information."

What? He had the same clearance as Tony… "Override code 829674. Is Peter Parker Spider-Man?"

"I am not authorized to reveal that information to _anyone,_ " she clarified. "You'll have to ask Mr. Parker himself."

 _Spider-Baby,_ the Hulk asserted.

Bruce sighed and facepalmed. _Of course my son is a superhero. Keep him safe?_

_Duh._

* * *

 

"Tony?" Bruce called. "You in here?"

A tiny, curly-haired brunette poked his head over the couch and squealed. "Oh, hello, Dr. Banner Mr. Hulk, sir!"

Bruce froze.

Peter didn't catch on. "I know I've met you before, but, you know-"

_SPIDER-BABY!_

It took everything Bruce had to keep the Other Guy from bursting out and crushing the poor spiderling in a hug.

"Hello," Banner finally managed to squeak. "Please, call me D… Bruce." He cursed at himself. It had been over ten years and he _still_ slipped up and asked people to call him Richard on occasion. Or Dad. Apparently, even ten years later, Peter could activate parental instincts.

Tony strode out of the elevator and paused. His eyes lit up just a moment after Peter turned and faced him.

Bruce mimed shushing. _We'll talk later,_ he mouthed.

The billionaire nodded and continued toward his mentee. "How's it going, kid?"

Peter hopped in his arms. "It's great! I…" He glanced back at the doctor.

"The Other Guy tattled," Bruce muttered sheepishly. "Spider-Man, right?"

"Yeah!" The spiderling turned back to Tony. "I managed to save a litter of puppies from a burning building, and the owners wanted to give me one! So I kind of took her in and figured I could always give her to Ned if I had to. I can't keep her at the apartment because May's allergic, so…"

The kid really managed to activate parental instincts in _everyone_. Tony enthusiastically listened to every moment of Spider-Man's adventures. The Hulk even got a little whoop in at a particularly close call (both for Spider-Man and Bruce). What about this kid screamed, "Protect me! I am a precious cinnamon roll!"? It certainly wasn't part of his powers. Richard knew from experience just how sweet the kid was.

* * *

 

"You're his father," Tony squealed.

"Prove it."

"FRIDAY said you'd done extra monitoring on him, but you didn't know he was Spidey until she basically threw it in your face. That eliminated curiosity about Spider-Man's identity. I thought maybe the Other Guy asked you for a favor, but since you don't really talk much, who knows? You have similar facial shapes, eye color, hair color, too, before you went grey. You both survived fatal exposure to radiation - gamma for you, unidentified _venomous_ radioactive spider for Peter. Besides, where else could he get his genius from? You're one of maybe 5 people on this planet I can hold an intelligent conversation with, and Peter's right up there with you. Who else could be his father?"

Bruce grinned. "You ran DNA tests, didn't you?"

"Absolutely." The mechanic hopped around the lab, apparently excited by the news. "So you know he's- oh, God, am I actually considering outing him?"

"Tony, I've basically been stalking him whenever I could for the past 10 years." The doctor hesitated. "That sounded better in my head."

"Everything does. I know what you mean, though. Did a little stalking myself to get what I needed." Tony bounced more. "So you know?"

"Of course. I've known since I came back to the States. If it wouldn't be awkward, I'd congratulate him on the parallel between his current name and dead-name."

Tony grinned. "Are you gonna tell him?"

"Not unless the Other Guy slips up."

_Not gonna tell Spider-Baby. Maybe Nat. Nat nice. Nat keeps secrets._

"He says he isn't going to." Bruce grinned and slid Tony's missing wrench across the table. "Looking for this?"

* * *

 

Peter had fallen asleep curled into Tony's side as they watched Star Wars for the tenth time that week. Not that Bruce cared. That was gone when Nick told him to drop Richard off the grid.

It still hurt just a bit.

 _Should be you,_ the Other Guy murmured. _Trust Tony?_

Bruce pushed down his jealousy. He gave up any right to Peter when he went undercover. _Tony won't let anything happen to him._

_Sure?_

_I'm sure, big guy._

* * *

 

Bruce fiddled with his pop socket as he finished another sudoku puzzle. Not that anyone knew he played sudoku to calm down. It kept him just occupied enough to think without really thinking, and today was absolute shit.

"What's it say?" Peter asked, likely out of politeness. With his senses, he'd be able to read it a mile away. Or maybe Bruce covered part of it. It didn't matter.

"Uh, it's got numbers. For. Things." He fiddled with it more.

The spiderling peeled Bruce's finger up surprisingly gently, pausing when the text was no longer hidden. "I didn't know there was a text line."

"I didn't either until I got this."

"Where'd you get it?"

"Some school thing. They were giving them out. I got invited to give a speech, but…" He shrugged. "Didn't trust the Other Guy to not get overprotective."

_Shut up._

"He's a real softie when you get to know him. He actually saved my life more than once." _Love you, too._

Peter grinned. "He saw me injured as Spider-Man. I thought he was going to kill me, but he just scooped me up, gave me a hug, and kept everyone away until Mr. Stark got there."

"That would explain why he recognized you."

Peter stared.

"Tony told me about you, so I did a bit of… research. He loves you, Peter. As I said. Big ol' softie."

"So…" Peter tapped the pop socket again. "Why?"

"Do you really want to know?"

He shuffled awkwardly on the couch. "If you tell, I'll tell."

Bruce sighed. "Okay. So… One day, I couldn't find a reason to go on. I mean, yeah, people still talked to me about my report on gamma radiation, but I ended up being a one-hit wonder. I couldn't contribute anything more to modern science. The world didn't need me anymore, and honestly… I didn't want to stay alive. So I ate a bullet. That was probably the first time the Other Guy talked to me. Actually talked. Yeah, he'd… interacted, if you could call it that, but he was usually pretty quiet. Maybe a grunt here or there. He spit out the bullet and told me I was too important to die."

Peter squished the doctor in a spider-strength hug. The Hulk got a similar idea across.

 _Live,_ he growled.

 _I will,_ Bruce promised.

When Peter pulled away, he bit his lip. "I learned about my metabolism in probably the dumbest way. So, like, statistics say that while women attempt suicide more, men are more successful, right? And I'd just figured out… I'm a guy. Trans guy. And some people didn't like that. I was scared. And on top of that, I become fu-freaking Spider-Man, so I have the press to deal with, and then just… Everything sucked. And I wanted to know which statistic I'd be in. Apparently, I'm in the former. And that almost made it worse. But I just kept overdosing. How long until my body couldn't metabolize it? How much did I need to take? How much until I finally end it all?" He fiddled with his sleeve. "At some point, I literally couldn't stop trying to kill myself… until Aunt May caught me. I'd decided that was the night I finally died. I had a noose in my closet. Spider-healing wouldn't help if I broke my neck and strangled myself, right? Just as insurance, in case the meds didn't work, but I'd spent hundreds of dollars getting stronger meds. I even swiped some oxy from a drug bust. They had, like, heroin and stuff. They didn't need it to get in trouble." He laughed. "Dr. Banner? Don't fuck with oxy. Ever. Can't even let Mr. Stark hit me with the leftovers from Captain America because it's basically reinforced oxy and I'm terrified of getting addicted again. Withdrawals suck."

It was Bruce's turn to hug the spiderling, though with a bit more strength than usual.

_Love Spider-Baby._

_That makes two of us._

* * *

 

"You look like me," Peter stated as the movie ended.

"Me?" Tony squeaked, shocked.

"No. Dr. Banner."

Bruce choked on his popcorn. "What?"

"Like, not really. But sort of. I guess you look like me the same way Uncle Ben looked like me? You could be related to me, but I obviously still have my mom's genes."

"Oh," Bruce wheezed, trying to hack the offending food out of his windpipe. "It's actually stuck. Help."

 _Left Spider-Baby hanging. Deserve it. Still breathing,_ the Hulk pouted.

_Thanks, big guy._

* * *

 

Now that they had a common goal, they talked a lot more. Bruce ended up more aware when the Other Guy was in charge, and it was no secret that he knew damn well what was going on when the doctor was around.

_Protect Peter._

* * *

 

 _I'm always angry,_ he'd told the rest of the Avengers. It wasn't a complete lie. He was always a bit quick to anger, but after the Other Guy came around, he'd tried to shove that part of him away.

It started as a whisper.

The Hulk told Bruce he didn't need to see this, but he did.

One of the athletic types pushed Peter.

Rage boiled up inside the doctor as he climbed out of the car.

_Control your anger. Don't let it control you._

"Hello." He smiled at the bully as he helped Peter up. "I don't believe we've met."

"You're…"

"I'm Dr. Banner." Bruce offered a hand. "And you are?"

 _I'll kill him,_ the Other Guy screamed.

 _Not yet. I want to savor this._ Most of the Avengers described Bruce as a do-good sweetheart with a bit of an anger problem. Even from his critics, they rarely described him as violent or cruel. In a way, it was true. Bruce Banner wasn't a sadist by any means. He didn't want to see innocent suffering. Some people just had it coming.

The bully grinned back and took his hand, not noticing the threat. "I'm Flash."

"Well, Flash…" Bruce jerked the kid closer and growled, "It's not nice to pick on people."

The kid almost tripped down the stairs himself in his hurry to run away. Bruce Banner wasn't intimidating, but the Other Guy was.

Nobody wanted to deal with the Other Guy.

* * *

 

"Mr. Stark?" Peter called.

"Yeah, kid?"

"Why is the Hulk crying?"

Tony froze. "The Hulk?"

"Unless you know another giant green rage monster."

"Did he tell you anything?"

"No. I think I accidentally startled Dr. Banner, and then he started seizing on the ground and yelled at me to get away, and-"

Tony hadn't run that fast in years.

* * *

 

"Hey, big guy."

The Other Guy glanced up.

 _Don't know what to do,_ he told Banner.

 _I know._ The doctor hesitated, but mentally patted the big guy's shoulder. _I thought you didn't like me invading your privacy?_

_Need help._

"You okay?"

He nodded. "Spider-Baby okay?"

Peter nodded and clutched his arm.

"Stop hurting." _Want to tell._

Bruce hesitated again. _I do, too, but… It's safer this way._

_I protect Spider-Baby._

_I know you will, big guy._

The Hulk may have inherited Banner's emotional constipation, but at least he knew when something was worth protecting. "Spider-Baby." He reached out for a hug, which the spiderling quickly obliged.

"Yeah, big guy?" he murmured.

"You my baby."

Peter raised his eyebrows. "What?"

"You my baby. Banner's baby. So my baby, too." He almost broke down again. This kid was amazing. _How?_

_I had to._

The Other Guy swore never to let this kid go… except Spider-Baby didn't give him a choice.

"You can't be…" Peter bit his lip. "My parents are dead."

_Let me out, big guy. I need to handle this._

_Spider-Baby sad. You bad at emotions._

_I'll take care of this. You can't smash your way out of this one, buddy._

The Hulk reluctantly let Bruce have control again, but not before hugging Spider-Baby one last time.

"Peter," Bruce whispered. "I was supposed to die. The Hulk saved my life."

"No." Peter backed up and crouched defensively. "You're not-"

"I'm sorry."

Tony rested a hand on the kid's shoulder. "His DNA matches that of Richard Parker."

A cold understanding settled in the spiderling's face. "You left me. You didn't want me."

Bruce gasped as quietly as he could. He needed to breathe, but the kid's misunderstanding ripped the breath from his lungs.

 _Always wanted Spider-Baby,_ the Other Guy rumbled soothingly.

"I always wanted you," the doctor forced out.

Peter just shook his head. "I need some time. I'm sorry."

Both men screamed as the spiderling dove past them and leapt off the balcony. Tony ran over and stared a moment. "He's okay. He caught himself."

"Does he always do that?" _Do you want to deal with this?_

Of course, the Other Guy took that as his cue to play the silent game.

"More than I'd like. I still can't get used to it."

* * *

 

"Dr. Banner?" Peter whispered shyly.

Bruce jumped up and scattered things everywhere. "I'm so sorry, Peter. We shouldn't've dropped that on you-"

"No, that's not…" The spiderling sighed. "I'm sorry. I know you didn't want to just leave me. I needed to process."

"Don't apologize, Peter. I think I'd've done the same."

They stood around awkwardly for a while before Peter muttered, "I have homework."

"If you want, you can do it in here."

"Really?"

"Yeah. I missed what, 11 years? Gotta start making up for it sometime."

Peter's laugh was worth it.

Peter was worth it.

**Author's Note:**

> my tumblr: [whatsanaccounttoagod](whatsanaccounttoagod.tumblr.com)


End file.
